There will be a time to grieve.

But I refuse to do so while she still lives.

And she does yet live.

It’s a weak, anxious, restless, disorienting, exhausting existence*, but she’s still here.

And so I resolve to enjoy her.

I will grieve later.

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*the opposite of these would make great prayers. Strength, peace, rest, clarity, and energy. Thank you. Your prayers have meant so much to me.

I am in Terre Haute, and if you haven’t heard on the news, Union Hospital has decided not to renew the contract for our midwives.  There are only these two midwives in our local area, and without them, our local women are losing a valuable childbirth option.  We have started a grassroots organization titled “Friends of Wabash Valley Midwifery,” and have been in contact with a group in North Carolina, “Where’s my Midwife?”  We are trying to make our voices heard and hopefully get union to change their minds.

We have written two letters to the hospital.  The first was answered in ways that just made us think of more questions or didn’t even answer the questions at all.  The second one, as of yet, has been unanswered. We have decided next week, we will begin picketing.  We are not sure about our number of supporters in the area, but would obviously like a huge turnout for this to show Union there are many who feel the way we do, that women deserve a choice in their health care provider.

I would like to invite any of you interested, to please come join us as we picket Union Hospital.  I’m not sure how far away some of you are, but it would really mean a lot to us if you would join us.  We plan on picketing for just an hour a day, Tuesday-Friday of next week.  If you can’t make it, but know someone that might be interested and able to, please pass along this information.

We created a sign up survey, containing more information about the picket, at this address:

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/Q3HZ3PZ

If you would like to contact us, please email:

WMMTerreHaute@gmail.com

You can also reach us on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?cropsuccess&id=579654851#!/group.php?gid=142794109077400

The only painful part was answering the question, “How long are you going to be in town?”

I’d rather not count the days.

“Indefinitely.”

We are staying with Josh’s grandparents who live half an hour from my mom. Josh leaves Monday nights and returns Thursday nights to spend long weekends with us.

We spend our days at Josh’s grandparents, doing school and laundry and keeping Levi happy (he doesn’t like it when the Daddy is away). We eat dinner with my mom and visit until she gets too tired for our rambunctious company. Then we head home and go to bed.

She is very weak and tired so our visits are usually no more than a couple hours.

But I love that we get to see her everyday.

A warm bath

Deliciously perfumed

Into which I slide and

Close my eyes.

I laugh. I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t believe it either, but I laughed.

Pray?

I’d been yelling at God within the confines of my skull for the past half an hour.

Prayer is too docile.

No. I’m not ready to pray yet.

So I let him pray for me.

And I ask you for the same. Please.

My mother was just given two months to live.

Josh told Benjamin it was too muggy to go out to play the night before last.  He thought about that for a minute and replied, “But I think the bats will eat the mosquitoes, Daddy.”  I was too impressed with his extensive knowledge of bats to notice right away that he misheard “muggy” as “buggy.”

Benjamin also has really gotten into role play with Olivia.  It’s so fun to watch them (with Daddy) reenact Peter Pan.  One particular showing they gave me, Benjamin was the pirate and he was supposed to be taking the treasure chest (jewelry box) from Wendy (Olivia).  He demanded in his loudest, meanest voice, “WOULD YOU PLEASE GIVE ME THE TREASURE!!” I thought it was cute.

Levi impersonates a monkey.  He’s really good at it, too.  Not the typical monkeys you hear on television, these are the real deal singing monkeys from our local zoo.  He sounds just like them.  I shall now attempt to insert audio onto the blog for the first time ever:  Levi ringtone <– The file is called Levi Ringtone because Josh requested that I save it as such and set it as his personal ringtone.

Levi has also been talking a lot lately.  Except not real words.  They’re just sounds.  Hardly any consonants at all.  But I recognize the inflections, so it’s been fun.  It’s all phrases that we say a lot around here.  ”Here you go!” is the most popular.  And I KNOW he said, “I love you, honey” today.  As I was putting Olivia down for quiet times today, I told her, “I love you, honey” and left.  As soon as I shut the door, he waved and say, “i-uh-oo-uhhh-eee.”  I was so excited, I opened up the door so he could say it right to her.  He refused.  And as soon as I shut the door, he said it again.  And then I put Benjamin down and told him I loved him.  As soon as I shut his door, Levi said, “i-uh-oo-uhh-ee”.

Stinker.

I accidentally made everything on my screen a size too big.  But I have no clue what combination I used to do so, and thus, no idea how to get it back to normal.  And as I rarely have a chance to sit down at the computer, I don’t really want to waste that precious time googling such nonsense.  So if you could help, awesome.  If not, meh.

I made lasagna in the crock pot today.  It was a huge success.  My favorite parts:  The kitchen wasn’t 500 degrees while it was baking, and it was actually done when Josh got home!  I think the secret to homeschooling AND having dinner ready on time is all in the crock pot.

I can already tell I’m a lot more relaxed with Levi than I was with the other three.  ”Oh, you want to climb on the kitchen table?  Fine.  Whatever.  As long as you know how to get off…”

Which turns into, “Oh my goodness, hang on, let me get the camera!”

Speaking of pictures…

No.  I didn’t get it.  I wanted to.  But I refrained.

During the Old Navy shopping trip in which the hula hoops were confiscated.  He watched Olivia perform an arabesque, and then turned around and did one himself.  I was so shocked, I thought it was coincidental.  I told him to do it again, and he did!

Olivia is FINALLY enrolled in a dance class.  She’s a tad excited.

And I felt a tad conspicuous standing on my tip toes taking pictures through this tiny window.  But I did anyway.

I think we have enough train tracks now.

Hmmm, guess I can’t sweep the hallways.

Darn.

And with that, the ramble ends.  Did you enjoy it?

Cheap, easy, fast, and they keep longer than gluten free bread.

I knew rice cakes were good with peanut butter.

And I knew they were good with jelly.

One day, I just put the two, or rather, three, together.

It’s not rocket science.

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What’s your favorite gluten-free adaptation/recipe?  Share at Naturally Knocked Up on her Wheatless Wednesday post!

We have limited drawer space in our kitchen.  So our kitchen towels are stored in the bathroom linen closet.

We have lots of messes.

Lots and lots of messes.

Mostly caused by small children.

Who can’t reach the kitchen towels in the bathroom linen closet.

Our solution?

Hanging a bajillion kitchen towels on the stove in the kitchen.

As many as will fit.

Easy to grab by little hands in a big hurry.

And we can handle up to a bajillion messes without having to restock the towel supply.

That’s, like, a whole hour!!

So now you know.

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This post is a contribution to Kitchen Tip Tuesday and Works For Me Wednesday.

Monday – Chicken and Asparagus Casserole.  I really need to post my gluten free version of this recipe.  It’s fantabulous.  Complete with buttery crumble topping.

Tuesday – Roast Chicken

Wednesday – Pot Roast

Thursday - Pizza, both whole wheat (this recipe, only replace half the bread flour with whole wheat flour) and cauliflower crust (need to perfect this recipe first, then share it!).

Friday – Leftover Night

Saturday – Leave for Chicago

Sunday – Leave for Colorado!

What are you eating this week?