Going? What kind of word is that?
Going.
Going. Boing.
My mind is Going.
And that about sums it up.
Benjamin is starting to get better during the night. He is waking up at 5 or 6 pretty regularly, and then wanting to nurse. Sometimes I tell him no, there’s no sun yet. Sometimes I pretend […]
Filed under: The Mommy, The News on July 23rd, 2008 | 9 Comments »
It doesn’t hurt like a fresh wound. It’s bothersome like a scab.
It was a fresh wound on Monday. It was real. And I cried. But now it’s more like a scab.
It gets brushed. Like when I slid into bed last Wednesday night and remembered how I had rested my hand upon […]
Filed under: The Miscarriage, The Mommy on July 18th, 2008 | 11 Comments »
Not on Wednesday, when I knew something was going wrong.
Not on Thursday, my day in waiting.
Not on Friday, when the blood tests showed the future.
A bit on Saturday, the contractions hurt so badly.
Not on Sunday, the day after it was over.
I cried on Monday.
Alone in the ultrasound room, looking at an empty womb, I prayed […]
Filed under: The Miscarriage, The Mommy on July 14th, 2008 | 24 Comments »
I held out hope when the bleeding started.
I reassured myself when I made the appointment.
I smiled comfortably while I wrapped the sheet around me and climbed up on the table.
But when the small talk faded into silence, I knew.
There was no labeling of baby parts. There was no recording of a heart beat.
There was […]
Filed under: The God, The Miscarriage, The Mommy on July 10th, 2008 | 46 Comments »
So this is what the Fourth of July looked like at our house:
Benjamin: Didn’t sleep well due to his fever, so Josh offered to take him so I could get a bit more sleep. When I finally rolled out of bed, I was looking forward to my usual open-armed-running-hug I usually get from my baby. […]
Filed under: The Benjamin, The Mommy, The Olivia on July 8th, 2008 | No Comments »
Today we were riding bikes along a trail through some beautifully wooded and prairie grassed areas. Just at sunset. I was in awe of the beauty.
And I saw a girl walking her dog on a dirt trail in the woods. On her cell phone.
My first thought, I kid you not, was, “Now […]
Filed under: The Mommy on June 28th, 2008 | 6 Comments »
