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When I Knew

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I held out hope when the bleeding started.

I reassured myself when I made the appointment.

I smiled comfortably while I wrapped the sheet around me and climbed up on the table.

But when the small talk faded into silence, I knew.

There was no labeling of baby parts. There was no recording of a heart beat.

There was no baby.

And yet, I still had peace.

The presence of God was leaning on me.

He was standing on a chair on my left side.

He put her blonde head on my chest, looked up at me with those deep brown eyes, and smiled so lovingly as He said, “I wuv you, Mommy.”

And I thank Him for that.

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